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Lizzy Borden

joansies in extreme_nerdery

The most extreme nerdery EVAR!

A new show has recently aired on SPIKE, "TV for men."  It is called Deadliest Warrior, and this show is, for lack of a better word, epic.  The premise of the show is that they take two elite warriors from different periods in history, and pit them against each other via their weapons and armor.  They then test the weapons for speed and force, and of course, damage.  The weapons are tested against pig carcasses for the similarity to human tissue, and a ballistics dummy of a skeleton encased in a ballistics gel that mimics human density and human tissue.  They will also put the armor (if the wariors have any) on said dummy and test the weapons against the armor, too.  At the end of each episode, you get to see a battle between the two warriors, including splattering blood, screams of pain, and the killing blow.

The only thing that irritates me about the show is the posturing from the experts for each warrior.  It's a lot of "My cock is bigger than your's!  HAR HAR HAR!"  Other than that, this show is intensely entertaining.  Actually, the goofy posturing is pretty entertaining, too.

The first episode was Gladiator vs. Appache Brave.  My bet was on the Gladiator, due to sheer brute force and the desire to kill.

The winner of this one was the Appache Brave.  They had considerably more weapons, sometimes upwards of 20 knives on them at once, and they were incredibly specialized with them.  In this case, finesse and skill won out over brute force. 
The second episode was Samurai vs. Viking.  As much as I wanted to say the Viking would win, I put my money on the Samurai due to extensive training, speed, and better weapons

Samurai won, like I thought.  While the viking's chain mail armor did a lot for him in deflecting the Samurai katana, ultimately the Samurai's skill and speed won out.  However, both combatants were fairly bloodied.  But the Samurai hamstrung the viking and jabbed him through the throat with something sharp and pointy.  I don't recall which weapon offhand.

Tonights episode was Spartan vs. Ninja.  I figured Ninja would win because of sophisticated weapons used to fight and kill Samurai.

I wanted the Spartan to win, but I figured the Ninja would.  In this case, I'm pleased to say the one I WANTED to win, did.  What it boiled down to was superior armor and shield won out over all the Ninja's advanced steel weaponry.  The Ninja could hurt the Spartan, but the Spartan could kill the Ninja.  The Spartan's massive bronze shield is what ultimately gave him the edge.

You can view the previous episodes here, and find out more about the show.  I believe the episodes are even up on YouTube.  This way, you folks not in the USA can see the show too, if you like.  Next week's episode is Pirate vs. Knight.  EPIC!!!  My money was on the knight, but then I remembered, pirate has pistols.  Pirate might just win, unless of course the knight can remove the pistols from the equation.  Then I think the knight would win. 


August 2009

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